Transcript
Let's dive back into the topic of emotional distance. If you've ever had that strange, lonely feeling that your partner is physically right there but emotionally miles away, you know how confusing it can be. When a partner starts to pull away emotionally, one of the first things you'll probably notice is how the little moments of affection just stop.
That quick kiss in the hallway, the way they’d rest their hand on your leg while you’re watching TV, or the hug from behind while you’re making dinner. Maybe they used to squeeze your shoulder when they walked past or pull you in close for no reason at all. All those tiny, unspoken ways you stayed connected start to quietly disappear.
And you really feel it. They’re still there physically, sitting next to you and sleeping in the same bed, but the warmth is gone. It’s like their body is in the room, but their heart and mind have already left.
Even sex starts to feel different. It’s not just that it’s happening less; when it does, it feels cold and disconnected. There's no spark, no real build-up. You lean in for a real kiss and they turn their head, or they give you one of those quick, empty pecks that feels totally forced, like they’re just going through the motions.
You’re being intimate, but it doesn’t feel intimate. They aren't present, there's no eye contact, no tenderness, no sense that they actually want to be there with you. It’s like their mind is a million miles away. Afterwards, instead of feeling closer, you just feel more alone, like the whole thing was a performance or just another chore to check off a list.
But maybe the biggest emotional red flag of all is simply when they stop saying “I love you.” Or, if they do say it, it's only after you've said it first, and it comes out flat and tired, like it’s just something they’re supposed to say.
It’s not just a feeling either. Researchers have actually found that one of the biggest emotional signs of cheating is exactly this: people who are unfaithful stop saying “I love you” as often.
Because saying “I love you” while you’re cheating makes a person feel gross. It's that cognitive dissonance we talked about earlier. Their actions don’t match the words, so the words feel fake and eventually they just stop saying them altogether.
But sometimes the opposite happens too. People will cheat while telling themselves they still love their partner. They are trying to live two different lives, and that causes a lot of internal conflict. They might truly believe they can love you and someone else at the same time, or they see the affair as a separate "mistake" that doesn't change their love for you.
This creates an enormous amount of guilt. To cope with that guilt, they don't pull away, they do the exact opposite. They overcompensate.
Suddenly, they’re showering you with affection, buying you gifts, and saying "I love you" more than ever before. Every compliment and every hug is an attempt to quiet their own conscience, to prove to themselves, as much as to you, that they are still the loving, devoted partner they want to believe they are.
Either way, it’s not real connection. It’s a performance.
So, don’t just listen to what they say. Watch how they show up.
Are they truly present with you? Do they ask about your day and actually listen? Do they see you? Or does it feel like you're living with a ghost, someone who’s slowly fading away right in front of you?
Real love, even when life gets hard and messy, doesn't just vanish like that.
Emotional distance is a major red flag.
Read More
Transcript
Let's dive back into the topic of emotional distance. If you've ever had that strange, lonely feeling that your partner is physically right there but emotionally miles away, you know how confusing it can be. When a partner starts to pull away emotionally, one of the first things you'll probably notice is how the little moments of affection just stop.
That quick kiss in the hallway, the way they’d rest their hand on your leg while you’re watching TV, or the hug from behind while you’re making dinner. Maybe they used to squeeze your shoulder when they walked past or pull you in close for no reason at all. All those tiny, unspoken ways you stayed connected start to quietly disappear.
And you really feel it. They’re still there physically, sitting next to you and sleeping in the same bed, but the warmth is gone. It’s like their body is in the room, but their heart and mind have already left.
Even sex starts to feel different. It’s not just that it’s happening less; when it does, it feels cold and disconnected. There's no spark, no real build-up. You lean in for a real kiss and they turn their head, or they give you one of those quick, empty pecks that feels totally forced, like they’re just going through the motions.
You’re being intimate, but it doesn’t feel intimate. They aren't present, there's no eye contact, no tenderness, no sense that they actually want to be there with you. It’s like their mind is a million miles away. Afterwards, instead of feeling closer, you just feel more alone, like the whole thing was a performance or just another chore to check off a list.
But maybe the biggest emotional red flag of all is simply when they stop saying “I love you.” Or, if they do say it, it's only after you've said it first, and it comes out flat and tired, like it’s just something they’re supposed to say.
It’s not just a feeling either. Researchers have actually found that one of the biggest emotional signs of cheating is exactly this: people who are unfaithful stop saying “I love you” as often.
Because saying “I love you” while you’re cheating makes a person feel gross. It's that cognitive dissonance we talked about earlier. Their actions don’t match the words, so the words feel fake and eventually they just stop saying them altogether.
But sometimes the opposite happens too. People will cheat while telling themselves they still love their partner. They are trying to live two different lives, and that causes a lot of internal conflict. They might truly believe they can love you and someone else at the same time, or they see the affair as a separate "mistake" that doesn't change their love for you.
This creates an enormous amount of guilt. To cope with that guilt, they don't pull away, they do the exact opposite. They overcompensate.
Suddenly, they’re showering you with affection, buying you gifts, and saying "I love you" more than ever before. Every compliment and every hug is an attempt to quiet their own conscience, to prove to themselves, as much as to you, that they are still the loving, devoted partner they want to believe they are.
Either way, it’s not real connection. It’s a performance.
So, don’t just listen to what they say. Watch how they show up.
Are they truly present with you? Do they ask about your day and actually listen? Do they see you? Or does it feel like you're living with a ghost, someone who’s slowly fading away right in front of you?
Real love, even when life gets hard and messy, doesn't just vanish like that.
Emotional distance is a major red flag.
Read More
Transcript
Let's dive back into the topic of emotional distance. If you've ever had that strange, lonely feeling that your partner is physically right there but emotionally miles away, you know how confusing it can be. When a partner starts to pull away emotionally, one of the first things you'll probably notice is how the little moments of affection just stop.
That quick kiss in the hallway, the way they’d rest their hand on your leg while you’re watching TV, or the hug from behind while you’re making dinner. Maybe they used to squeeze your shoulder when they walked past or pull you in close for no reason at all. All those tiny, unspoken ways you stayed connected start to quietly disappear.
And you really feel it. They’re still there physically, sitting next to you and sleeping in the same bed, but the warmth is gone. It’s like their body is in the room, but their heart and mind have already left.
Even sex starts to feel different. It’s not just that it’s happening less; when it does, it feels cold and disconnected. There's no spark, no real build-up. You lean in for a real kiss and they turn their head, or they give you one of those quick, empty pecks that feels totally forced, like they’re just going through the motions.
You’re being intimate, but it doesn’t feel intimate. They aren't present, there's no eye contact, no tenderness, no sense that they actually want to be there with you. It’s like their mind is a million miles away. Afterwards, instead of feeling closer, you just feel more alone, like the whole thing was a performance or just another chore to check off a list.
But maybe the biggest emotional red flag of all is simply when they stop saying “I love you.” Or, if they do say it, it's only after you've said it first, and it comes out flat and tired, like it’s just something they’re supposed to say.
It’s not just a feeling either. Researchers have actually found that one of the biggest emotional signs of cheating is exactly this: people who are unfaithful stop saying “I love you” as often.
Because saying “I love you” while you’re cheating makes a person feel gross. It's that cognitive dissonance we talked about earlier. Their actions don’t match the words, so the words feel fake and eventually they just stop saying them altogether.
But sometimes the opposite happens too. People will cheat while telling themselves they still love their partner. They are trying to live two different lives, and that causes a lot of internal conflict. They might truly believe they can love you and someone else at the same time, or they see the affair as a separate "mistake" that doesn't change their love for you.
This creates an enormous amount of guilt. To cope with that guilt, they don't pull away, they do the exact opposite. They overcompensate.
Suddenly, they’re showering you with affection, buying you gifts, and saying "I love you" more than ever before. Every compliment and every hug is an attempt to quiet their own conscience, to prove to themselves, as much as to you, that they are still the loving, devoted partner they want to believe they are.
Either way, it’s not real connection. It’s a performance.
So, don’t just listen to what they say. Watch how they show up.
Are they truly present with you? Do they ask about your day and actually listen? Do they see you? Or does it feel like you're living with a ghost, someone who’s slowly fading away right in front of you?
Real love, even when life gets hard and messy, doesn't just vanish like that.
Emotional distance is a major red flag.