Transcript
So how do you figure out if your partner is genuinely trustworthy? Instead of just guessing, let’s look at what their behavior actually tells you.
Let’s start with the most fundamental test. Do their actions match their words? It’s incredibly easy for someone to say things like “I love you” or “I’d never hurt you,” but do they follow through? If they say they’re going to call you after work, do they actually call? If they promise they’ll stop talking to someone, do they actually stop? Or do they act annoyed when you bring up something they once claimed was important to them, like meeting your family or planning that vacation? Trustworthy people do what they say they’re going to do, consistently. Remember, love is a behavior, not just a word.
This idea of follow-through matters just as much when they hurt you or mess up. Do they actually care? Do they show real, genuine remorse? Or do they just act sorry to avoid a fight or get you to drop it? There’s a huge difference between someone who recognizes they’ve hurt you and actively tries to fix it, and someone who performs an apology just to keep the peace. A trustworthy person doesn’t just say sorry. They show it. They change their behavior, put in the effort, and keep showing up, not because they got caught, but because they genuinely care about making it right.
That brings up another thing to watch for. Do they tell you the truth on their own, or only when they get caught? Someone you can truly trust will be honest with you even when it’s uncomfortable or makes them look bad. They’ll say something like, “Just so you know, I ran into my ex today and we talked for a bit. It was awkward, but I wanted to be the one to tell you.” They don’t hide things just because it would be easier to stay quiet. In contrast, someone who isn’t trustworthy will keep things hidden unless they’re backed into a corner. They only tell you what they absolutely have to, and usually, that’s not much.
And when things go wrong, what’s their first move? Do they take responsibility, or is it always someone else’s fault? Listen for the excuses. Things like, “I only did that because you were making me mad,” or “I only lied because I knew you’d freak out.” That’s them flipping it around to avoid owning their choices. A trustworthy partner won’t do that. They’ll just say, “I messed up. That was my fault. I’m sorry.” No excuses, no guilt-tripping, and no turning it back on you. They own it. That’s what taking responsibility really looks like.
This all connects to something much deeper. Does your partner understand that trust has to be earned? Or do they expect you to hand it over just because you’re in a relationship? A lot of guys try to manipulate you with lines like, “If you really loved me, you’d just trust me,” or, “Why are you being so insecure? You should trust me.” But trust isn’t a given. It’s built slowly over time through consistent, honest behavior. And if they’ve broken that trust, they don’t get to snap their fingers and demand it back. They have to earn it, piece by piece, by showing up consistently and honestly. If your partner doesn’t get that, if they act offended by the idea that they should have to prove they’re trustworthy, that says a lot about them. And none of it is good.
At the end of the day, if someone keeps lying, hiding things, or offering half-hearted apologies, it all comes down to one thing. They don’t care enough about how their actions make you feel. They care about themselves. If they truly respected you, they’d feel awful about breaking your trust and work to fix it. If they aren’t doing that, they’re showing you everything you need to know.
That’s why, before you start trying to figure out their personality traits and attachment wounds, you should ask a much simpler question. Would my soulmate be someone who lies to me? If the answer feels shaky, you don’t need to dig any deeper. You already have your answer.
Read More
Transcript
So how do you figure out if your partner is genuinely trustworthy? Instead of just guessing, let’s look at what their behavior actually tells you.
Let’s start with the most fundamental test. Do their actions match their words? It’s incredibly easy for someone to say things like “I love you” or “I’d never hurt you,” but do they follow through? If they say they’re going to call you after work, do they actually call? If they promise they’ll stop talking to someone, do they actually stop? Or do they act annoyed when you bring up something they once claimed was important to them, like meeting your family or planning that vacation? Trustworthy people do what they say they’re going to do, consistently. Remember, love is a behavior, not just a word.
This idea of follow-through matters just as much when they hurt you or mess up. Do they actually care? Do they show real, genuine remorse? Or do they just act sorry to avoid a fight or get you to drop it? There’s a huge difference between someone who recognizes they’ve hurt you and actively tries to fix it, and someone who performs an apology just to keep the peace. A trustworthy person doesn’t just say sorry. They show it. They change their behavior, put in the effort, and keep showing up, not because they got caught, but because they genuinely care about making it right.
That brings up another thing to watch for. Do they tell you the truth on their own, or only when they get caught? Someone you can truly trust will be honest with you even when it’s uncomfortable or makes them look bad. They’ll say something like, “Just so you know, I ran into my ex today and we talked for a bit. It was awkward, but I wanted to be the one to tell you.” They don’t hide things just because it would be easier to stay quiet. In contrast, someone who isn’t trustworthy will keep things hidden unless they’re backed into a corner. They only tell you what they absolutely have to, and usually, that’s not much.
And when things go wrong, what’s their first move? Do they take responsibility, or is it always someone else’s fault? Listen for the excuses. Things like, “I only did that because you were making me mad,” or “I only lied because I knew you’d freak out.” That’s them flipping it around to avoid owning their choices. A trustworthy partner won’t do that. They’ll just say, “I messed up. That was my fault. I’m sorry.” No excuses, no guilt-tripping, and no turning it back on you. They own it. That’s what taking responsibility really looks like.
This all connects to something much deeper. Does your partner understand that trust has to be earned? Or do they expect you to hand it over just because you’re in a relationship? A lot of guys try to manipulate you with lines like, “If you really loved me, you’d just trust me,” or, “Why are you being so insecure? You should trust me.” But trust isn’t a given. It’s built slowly over time through consistent, honest behavior. And if they’ve broken that trust, they don’t get to snap their fingers and demand it back. They have to earn it, piece by piece, by showing up consistently and honestly. If your partner doesn’t get that, if they act offended by the idea that they should have to prove they’re trustworthy, that says a lot about them. And none of it is good.
At the end of the day, if someone keeps lying, hiding things, or offering half-hearted apologies, it all comes down to one thing. They don’t care enough about how their actions make you feel. They care about themselves. If they truly respected you, they’d feel awful about breaking your trust and work to fix it. If they aren’t doing that, they’re showing you everything you need to know.
That’s why, before you start trying to figure out their personality traits and attachment wounds, you should ask a much simpler question. Would my soulmate be someone who lies to me? If the answer feels shaky, you don’t need to dig any deeper. You already have your answer.
Read More
Transcript
So how do you figure out if your partner is genuinely trustworthy? Instead of just guessing, let’s look at what their behavior actually tells you.
Let’s start with the most fundamental test. Do their actions match their words? It’s incredibly easy for someone to say things like “I love you” or “I’d never hurt you,” but do they follow through? If they say they’re going to call you after work, do they actually call? If they promise they’ll stop talking to someone, do they actually stop? Or do they act annoyed when you bring up something they once claimed was important to them, like meeting your family or planning that vacation? Trustworthy people do what they say they’re going to do, consistently. Remember, love is a behavior, not just a word.
This idea of follow-through matters just as much when they hurt you or mess up. Do they actually care? Do they show real, genuine remorse? Or do they just act sorry to avoid a fight or get you to drop it? There’s a huge difference between someone who recognizes they’ve hurt you and actively tries to fix it, and someone who performs an apology just to keep the peace. A trustworthy person doesn’t just say sorry. They show it. They change their behavior, put in the effort, and keep showing up, not because they got caught, but because they genuinely care about making it right.
That brings up another thing to watch for. Do they tell you the truth on their own, or only when they get caught? Someone you can truly trust will be honest with you even when it’s uncomfortable or makes them look bad. They’ll say something like, “Just so you know, I ran into my ex today and we talked for a bit. It was awkward, but I wanted to be the one to tell you.” They don’t hide things just because it would be easier to stay quiet. In contrast, someone who isn’t trustworthy will keep things hidden unless they’re backed into a corner. They only tell you what they absolutely have to, and usually, that’s not much.
And when things go wrong, what’s their first move? Do they take responsibility, or is it always someone else’s fault? Listen for the excuses. Things like, “I only did that because you were making me mad,” or “I only lied because I knew you’d freak out.” That’s them flipping it around to avoid owning their choices. A trustworthy partner won’t do that. They’ll just say, “I messed up. That was my fault. I’m sorry.” No excuses, no guilt-tripping, and no turning it back on you. They own it. That’s what taking responsibility really looks like.
This all connects to something much deeper. Does your partner understand that trust has to be earned? Or do they expect you to hand it over just because you’re in a relationship? A lot of guys try to manipulate you with lines like, “If you really loved me, you’d just trust me,” or, “Why are you being so insecure? You should trust me.” But trust isn’t a given. It’s built slowly over time through consistent, honest behavior. And if they’ve broken that trust, they don’t get to snap their fingers and demand it back. They have to earn it, piece by piece, by showing up consistently and honestly. If your partner doesn’t get that, if they act offended by the idea that they should have to prove they’re trustworthy, that says a lot about them. And none of it is good.
At the end of the day, if someone keeps lying, hiding things, or offering half-hearted apologies, it all comes down to one thing. They don’t care enough about how their actions make you feel. They care about themselves. If they truly respected you, they’d feel awful about breaking your trust and work to fix it. If they aren’t doing that, they’re showing you everything you need to know.
That’s why, before you start trying to figure out their personality traits and attachment wounds, you should ask a much simpler question. Would my soulmate be someone who lies to me? If the answer feels shaky, you don’t need to dig any deeper. You already have your answer.